My sisters and I gave this life sketch at my dad's funeral, and I want to always remember it. Brittany read the blue sections, Melissa the black, and I read the red.
Brent Fenton Thurston was born April 2, 1958 in Las Vegas, NV. He was the second child of Verland Leslie Thurston and Dorothy Dawn Frehner. He was a darling baby that everyone oohed and aahed over. In a journal entry his mother wrote on his 7th birthday, she described dad as “a joy . . . who is always whistling.” He always did love to whistle. He was a bright, happy, fun person with a quiet sense of humor. Dad had a close and loving home, with parents who taught him well.
Dad was taught young to trust his Heavenly Father. As a young child, dad and his big brother Brad would go swimming almost every day. One day they visited a new pool with two high diving boards, one shorter and one higher. Dad was only 2 or 3 years old at the time. He watched those diving boards, and then told his mom that he wanted to go off the shorter one. He climbed up and - after looking over the edge for a long time - finally jumped. The pool attendants fished him out as was customary. After the first jump, he decided he wanted to go off the high dive. Grandma tried to discourage him, but he was determined. He climbed up and stood a very, very long time looking over the edge. Then he jumped. Afterwards he told his mother what it was like. “I went down, down, down,” he said. “Then I started to pray and I went up, up, up.”
Their home was one in which they were taught to love one another. Throughout his life, dad looked up to his big brother Brad. As young children, they had a little car that they would play on all day. Brad would pedal the car backwards and forwards all over their small cement pad, and dad would sit on the hood and hang on for dear life. Anything Brad did, dad wanted to do also. One time at a softball game, Brad hit a home run. Dad was up to bat next. He got up and hit a home run, too. He loved his brother and wanted to be just like him.
Dad also loved his three younger siblings. He was the special protector of his two sisters, Darla especially remembers dad protecting her from Duane’s teasing, and they looked up to dad and idolized him as their cool big brother.
As dad grew older, he was taught to work hard. As children, Dad and Brad longed for spider bicycles. Grandma and Grandpa didn’t have enough money, but they encouraged the boys to work and save their money. The boys faithfully worked their paper route and saved up for over a year. When they had finally saved enough money, they were so thrilled to finally get their bikes.
Service was another important trait dad was taught at home. When dad was young, construction for the 20th ward church building was started. The building wasn’t even for dad’s ward, but dad decided he wanted to help. He sold candy and did odd jobs to help earn money for the church building. Uncle Dale, who was the Bishop of the 20th Ward, was so touched when dad donated his earnings towards the new church building.
One of dad’s special talents was athletics. Church softball and basketball was HUGE in the 70’s in Las Vegas. The teams had real nice full uniforms and complete warm up suits for basketball and they had the sharpest royal blue uniforms with white pinstripes for their softball team. Dad’s friend, Dan Creel, said the following: “In our age group Brent was by far the best softball player in the whole Las Vegas Valley. Wherever we played every team knew about Brent Thurston. Either two things happened when Brent came to the plate, he was intentionally walked or he hit a mammoth home run that cleared the home run fence, the complex fence, over the road, and into the neighbor’s yard! Everybody was in awe on how far Brent could hit a softball. Brent had a rifle of an arm in the outfield. He loved it when somebody would test him rounding third and Brent would unload a missile to our catcher Jeff Lee. I know Jeff hated to see those guys round third because he knew Brent was trying to break his hand. The team would ride on Brent’s back to win our stake, region, and multi region tournaments and then we were off to Prescott, Arizona for the Southwest Areas. In basketball Brent was our point guard. He didn’t look like a typical point guard but he could handle the ball and shoot the lights out from the top of the key. Too bad we didn’t have a 3-point line back in those days cause Brent could shoot from downtown. He would always tell me they should name that “Top of the Key Shot” after him! Again Brent led us into many stake, region, and multi region championships.”
Dad was also passionate about cars as a teenager. He was in love with his blue Formula 400 Firebird. His younger siblings remember how much dad loved his car. Darla remembers that it seemed to them like dad was washing it even more than he drove it. They loved helping dad wash his car. They would listen to music blasting on the 8-track. “Joy to the World,” and “Jeremiah was a Bullfrog,” seemed to be the favorite songs. Dad’s car had a removable handle, and he loved to pull it off and use it as his imaginary microphone as he sang along. Dad’s other prized possession as a teenager was his brown leather jacket. He loved that jacket and looked especially handsome when wearing it.
Dad had many close friends as a teenager. One of those friends, Dennis Van Beveran, shared the following memories: “During our sophomore or junior year of high school, several of us would sometimes ditch school and go to lunch. If Brent knew his mom would be gone, he would say lets go to my house. So we would first stop at 7-11, buy a Pepsi, a bag of Fritos and then head to Brent's house. Brent would go into one of the bedrooms and come out with a couple of cans of tuna fish and start making some sandwiches. Brent could indeed make a pretty good tuna sandwich. One evening while Jeff and I were at Brent's, his mom came in and asked "Brent, do you happen to know what happened to that case of tuna that was under the bed?" The rest of us quickly got up and told Brent we would wait for him outside. We left Brent there by himself with his mom so he could explain where her 24 cans of food storage went.”
Dennis also remembers the following memory, “Seems how it was hard to keep us three down, especially in the evening, we would go out and cruise around town. Dorothy, being the concerned mother that she was, would follow us out to her car, and she would write down the mileage of the car. She would then tell us not to go over a certain amount of miles. So at about 11 o'clock at night when we were done terrorizing the streets, we noticed we were quite a few miles over our limit. Brent had the idea that maybe if we drove backwards, the miles would come off. And sure enough they did. So for about the next 45 minutes in the parking lot of the Walnut and Carey chapel, the three of us were in this car going backwards, in circles, taking miles off the car. I don't know what was more crazy, his mom keeping track of the miles, or us 3 stooges in this blue 4-door Ford going in circles at 11 o'clock at night.”
Dad has always loved the outdoors. He was always going deer hunting and camping with his dad, brothers, and friends in the camper. Growing up, their family also made a point of going on a family vacation every year.
Duane remembers dad getting his Eagle Scout award. For his project, dad transformed a bare dirt area of the church ball fields into a desert landscape by planting palm trees, cactus and other desert plants.
After graduating from Rancho High School, dad was called to serve in the Montana, Billings Mission. Dad was a great missionary. He fell in love with the people and changed many people’s lives through his service. At first, dad was very homesick. He had been raised in a wonderful home and this was the first time he had really been away. Brent was encouraged by good friends to stick it out, and his mother talked to him saying that all his grandparents would be heartbroken if he came home. He stayed and put his heart and soul into his service. Later, he told his mother he had stayed because of his grandparents. It was on his mission that he solidified his deep testimony of the church.
Dad’s mission was in cattle ranch country. He ate steak for dinner and even breakfast almost everyday. Uncle Brad remembers that when they went to pick up dad from the airport after his mission, they had worked hard on saving money up so they could take him to a nice steak dinner. When they got to the restaurant dad just ordered spaghetti. Guess he finally got a little tired of all that steak!
Dorie, dad’s youngest sister, says that one of her earliest memories of dad is him coming home from his mission. “I thought Brent was so cool and I looked up to him and wanted him to baptize me. Brent baptized me and Dad confirmed me. We went to Macayo's after my baptism.” Dad always loved eating at Macayo’s. When ever he and mom made a trip to Las Vegas that it the restaurant they went to.
After his mission, dad attended Rick’s College. He took a Successful Marriage class, where he met a beautiful young lady named Laurie Anne Daw. Mom liked to tease dad that she got an A in the class, and he only got a B. After the semester was over, dad asked her out. He wore his leather jacket on their first date, and mom said he looked so handsome. They went to a movie, and mom thought it was so weird when he poured m&m’s into their popcorn. Little did she know that popcorn with m&m’s is a Thurston tradition and she would spend the rest of her life eating them together. It was a match made in heaven, and they both fell in love quickly. Two weeks after their first date, dad proposed to mom on February 2 as the snow was falling softly on a beautiful winter evening.
Shortly before they were married, my dad helped his family through his family’s hardest trial when his dad died unexpectedly from a heart attack. Dad was a huge support to his family during this time, and became a sort of father figure to his younger sisters. Mom and dad were married June 6, 1980, in the Idaho Falls, ID temple. Everyone remembers it being a beautiful, peaceful and happy day even though they were still mourning the death of their dad.
Family was always a top priority for dad. His sister, Dorie, says, “When I think of Brent, first and foremost I think of how much he loves his family. He was always so proud of his kids and family. There is no place he would rather be than be at home with his family.” It is true that dad did love his home and his family with his whole heart. He was an exceptional father, and he and mom did a great job of creating a wonderful home for us to grow up in.
Mom remembers how much he loved us each from the moment we were born. The first child Jennifer came 5 weeks early. Mom wasn’t finished with preparations to bring a new baby home. So dad went shopping and bought a beautiful wood cradle that all of the children used as newborns. We adored our dad as little children. He was always so strong. He would lie on his back and one of us would stand on his hands and he could lift us straight up. We always knew we had the strongest dad around.
When we were young kids dad played a lot of softball. One of our favorite memories is of going to dad’s ballgames. We would play and run around, cheer along with the crowd, and always stop to watch daddy when he was up to bat. He was always the best player.
Dad was always really patient. While we were growing up he never lost his temper, never swore or said anything mean when he was upset. He always knew how to handle situations. He was an expert at giving good advice. He said things in such a way that you didn’t feel you are being lectured. We learned early in life to trust dad. He knew what was best for us.
We always have had a lot of fun as family. Dad & Mom always made it a priority to have annual family vacations. We visited many fun places as a family. Over the summer we would pile into the truck and camper and take off on road trips for a few weeks. Those are some of our best memories we have being together as a family. While on road trips, dad would sometimes sing along to his favorite CD’s. He had a great singing voice. Other times he would honk randomly at nothing, and holler out, “Jackrabbit!” Or if we were sleeping he would drive on the bumps on the side of the road to wake us up.
We also spent a lot of time outdoors as a family. We loved going down to the river. We would all pile into the jeep with the dog and some snacks and go down for the afternoon. We would play in the water, ride four wheelers, each lunch, target shoot and much more. These times meant a lot to us. We often went camping. Dad loved fishing and hunting. We remember one time we went camping and fishing at Baker’s Reservoir with Duane’s family. We had a great time canoeing and fishing. The fish were really biting like crazy! Dad and Duane shared a canoe at one point and Dad stepped out of the canoe onto the shore, flipping Duane right into the lake!
Dad was an example of a righteous priesthood holder. Each of us was blessed as a baby by dad, and we can all remember being baptized and confirmed by our dad. He also lived to see all of us married in the temple.
Dad was a loving husband. My mom loved his great sense of humor. He could always make her laugh. When she was worried about something, he could help her laugh by singing “Don’t worry, be happy” to her. They were very consistent throughout their whole marriage at making time for each other; and they always had a regular date night. Dad was a romantic. We remember one Valentine’s Day when we wrote in lipstick “I love you” on mom’s bathroom mirror and left her gifts. He loved mom so much. One of dad’s students this year shared a memory with us about how one day during class mom came into dad’s classroom, and suddenly dad’s face lit up. Anytime when mom would be out of town for any reason, dad always wanted us to deep clean the house so that when she came home everything would be perfect for her. Our cousin Tara experienced one moment when dad showed his love for mom. She said, “When I went on a cruise with Grandma Thurston and all my aunts and uncles, Brent's wife received unexpected news that her sister had passed away. I remember being so impressed with the comfort and compassion he offered his wife at that time. It was almost as if he was the one holding her up and together. He was her strength.” Mom and dad were rarely apart; they simply enjoyed being together and spent most of their time with one another. Mom loved holding dad’s hand. He had such big, warm hands. They held hands every Sunday in sacrament meeting. They really were best friends.
After we were all born, dad and mom decided to go back to school. Dad has always had a passion for coaching, and he decided to become a teacher and athletic coach. Another reason for choosing this profession is that dad wanted to be able to spend as much time with his family as possible. After graduating, dad and mom decided to make their new home in Mesquite, where dad became a beloved part of the community.
We have memories of going to many, many baseball games dad coached. Dad was great at interacting with the boys and being a motivating coach. He coached Tyler’s baseball teams from the time Tyler was little. Everyone loved watching him as a coach. Duane loved watching dad give the baseball signals, especially when Tyler was the pitcher. Dad was really a good example to teenagers. He had an especially strong bond with his baseball boys. We can remember guys stopping by the house to say hi to dad, or hanging out talking to him after a game, or making a point to talk to him at school events. He encourage the boys to be good young men, to work hard and to attend college. He was a wonderful example, a great coach, and a caring teacher – someone they could trust.
The last baseball game of Tyler’s senior year was a close game, but one that the team ultimately lost. Grandma remembers after the game that dad and Tyler sat under a tree together and cried. Sure, they may have been crying somewhat for the lost game. But most likely there were more tears because it was the end of an era, the end of dad’s coaching Tyler, something he had done for over a decade. Dad really put his whole heart and soul into coaching and into raising his children.
One of dad’s greatest joys in life was his grandchildren. When he held Wyatt, Katelee, and Madi for the first time we could see the love that he had for them right away. They sure do love their grandpa. He spent lots of time with them. He loved to take them swimming in his pool, teach them new things, visit them, and take them on trips. This past summer he took Katelee to Disneyland and the beach for her first time, and he took Wyatt and Madi to Idaho for a fun vacation. We know he didn’t feel well, but that didn’t stop him from being with his grandchildren and doing things they loved.
Dad has not felt well for 2 years. Even though he felt terrible most of the time, he did all he could to hide it. If anyone asked how he was doing, we would reply that he was wonderful. He always had such a good attitude and never complained or asked why. He accepted his trial with dignity, even in those last hard days at the hospital.
Before he died, he took care of everything he needed to. He saw all this children married in the temple, and took vacations with mom. Aunt Darla was especially inspired to hold a Thurston family reunion just last month; everyone was there, including dad, and it was a perfect time to be together.
The last thing dad ever wanted was to be home. One doctor said he didn’t think dad could survive the trip to Mesquite. He said, “Brent, if I was a betting man, I would say you wouldn’t make it.” Dad was too sick to talk, but he still had a sense of humor. He lifted up his hand to shake on it. We all laughed, but we should have followed up on that bet. Dad knew he would make it home, and we did too. Our house was filled with an enormous peace as soon as he arrived. Dad was so happy and content to be at home again. We had two peaceful, happy days with him as we took turns sitting with him, reminiscing and laughing. It was especially tender to watch the grandchildren pat his hand and tell him they loved him. Dad rested peacefully the whole time; he definitely knew he was home.
A couple days before he died, we were all in the room with dad. Grandma Thurston said, “Look at your beautiful girls. What do you want to say to them?” Dad could hardly talk, but with his usual sense of humor he said, “They are lucky to have me.” Grandma then asked, “What do you want to say to your son?” Dad replied, “He’s especially lucky to have me.” Those were some of the last words we heard dad say. And we agree. Everyone who knew him was lucky to have him.
We love you so much dad. We know that you are finally home, home with your dad, other loved ones, and Heavenly Father. Thank you for being a wonderful husband, father and example to us. You will be missed.
There were more, but I can't bring myself to show the sadder ones.
